Official Seaton Carew RUFC

Sorry guys i wont be on tour.

But we all know you are not telling the truth eddy your wife opened the tin of beans many years ago.

We the OFFICIAL TC believe we only have only to speak for once & they will melt like the dust:
you have only to spit in their faces — they will go
howling like devils to swindle somebody else
But if you choose to obey, we shall not blame you
for every lesson we teach you is new. We will make room for you in our beds when
Yours have been stolen as in the cold hall
we believe every cause is just.
Perhaps you'll go with us to frosty windows
putting the same choice as the years go round
or sit debating 'When will they disobey the
REVOLUTION which is coming our way?'
Wrapped in our tour clothes against the impartial cold."
All this I think the drunken me would say, As we stand
above those who try to derail our committee for we are
the new official committee of the golden stag.

Would appear that the OTC have recruited a new member who they met for drinks in the SS Chooner the other day and he is an age old enemy of the old court and out for revenge. Some say he has traveled from across the golf range and can be found with his assistant fanta top most of the time.

Others say that he has disapeared over the last few weeks to invent a plan so hideous that even Peter Jnr wouldn't try to arm wrestle his way out of it.

Others say he is also the revolutionists leader looking for inside information to take down the tour.

All we know is the information was leaked over Facebook by an armored car of some kind.

And strong hints lately that flights to Libya are on the cheap........

Revolution up date is well over due.

Well the plot thickens seems like the OTC have managed to get there act together after all, it was noted by the revolutionary committee last night that one of the members was taking orders for the steak lunch every body will be getting before they get on the bus.

It was also noted that a said pornographer was taking extreme pictures of people’s faces, is this some strange fetish the OTC has instead of gimp masks they put tourist’s faces on and dance round naked in the dark to the sound of umpa lumpa music or are the photos for something more sinister? Like drawing up new most wanted posters of the people in the revolution that they want to bring down with the pain of the tour, we are like ninja’s in the dark we move in and out of conversations gathering the information we need like bat’s our network of informers are like bee’s in a hive.

It does sound like they are struggling to get a bus to get the tour to Sedgefield though, as they are now ordering shoes to compensate for the leather usage on the soles having to walk there.

Our strength in numbers is staying strong the REVOLUTION is as strong now as the day it began. The REVOLUTION is coming OTC & is getting closer by the day.

VIVA-LA-REVOLUTION…………….FOR I CHIEF CASTRO & MY GENERALS ARE SCRUF LEGENDS.

With the number of conflicts throughout the world at the moment the UN have decided to act quickly on what is said to be the beginning of what some calling an eclipse of the French revolution in terms of size and death total.

Rumours that the revolution will be aided by the likes of Guddafi , Stalin , Kenny Mugabe , Cambridge Hussain ,Maro Spartacus , William Ghandi and Mark Napoleon have added more fuel to the fire. The UN will be sending £50,000 worth of pork scratchings to keep the revolt at bay for the time being.

The UN have also intercepted some of the messages of support they have been receiving.

Dig in deep and you’ll never lose your country – Guddafi

Draft beer, not people for the safety of the bar! – Rob Mugabe

Give it to them – The whole truth

You can do it – Steve from autoglass

When in doubt lock Si out – NSPCC

Free the gingers! - Marco Spartacus

I’m with you all the way – Tank

NEWS FLASH ……….....................................…ZIN ZAN - Defects to the west in an tempt to join the N.O.T.C


President Castro ace of spades has been dealt a heavy blow with the defection to OTC of one of his closest allies.
Foreign minister Zin Zan fled of shore with his head held in shame after he deciding that he was "no longer willing" to represent the dictator on the world stage.

The N.O.T.C called on other members of the regime to follow Zin Zans example and "embrace a better future for the Tour".
However, it remains to be seen whether the high-profile departure can help tip the balance as N.O.T.C struggle in the face of a major military onslaught by Castro’s forces.

Rumours started to spread on Monday night that Zin Zan had decided to defect after the official Tour news agency TAP reported he had boarded a chopper from Home to of shore in a hurry. The Revolution authorities initially claimed he was on a diplomatic mission for Castro, but within hours the Foreign Office confirmed that his real motive had been to seek refuge and immunity from tour punishment during the tour.

"We can confirm that Zin Zan arrived at Aberdeen Airport on March 30 from Hartlepool," a spokesman said. "He travelled here under his own free will. He has told us that he is resigning his post and would like to join the OTC in some capacity.

"Zin Zan is one of the most senior figures in Castro’s government and his role was to represent the regime internationally - something that he is no longer willing to do. We encourage those around Castro to abandon him and embrace a better future for Seaton Tours.

Zin Zan has long been a key player in Castro’s regime and previously acted as the Revolutions representative in the club on many occasions. He was widely credited with persuading the dictator to reach an accommodation with the West and stop developing leaky drinking buckets and non consumable food.

The news is a much-needed boost for the OTC opposition and international efforts to end Castro’s long rule. The OTC’s troops have recaptured the strategic virgins of the BIG V and are pressing forward in talking 2 choice Braham in to 1 choice and joining the OTC full time.

The famous 5 former foreign secretary Mark Appleyard later said Zin Zan played a "fundamentally important" role in the negotiations to bring the Revolution in from the cold and his apparent defection would be a "very important factor" in undermining Castro’s regime.

His final words before boarding the chopper where "Down with the revolution and long live tour rule"

News flash……..Dimitris Braham stays strong to the revolution, Zin Zan comes under pressure on his decisions to defect.

The O.T.C has sent in a trusted adviser in to negations with Castro as the new dictatorship hunts for a way out of his stand-off with the tour community.

Jeff-hung-like-a-donkey was seen holding talks with Castro and a number of his revolutionists at the weekend not far from the elevator.
Foreign minister Dimitris Braham said: "From the O.T.C envoy's comments it appears that the regime is seeking a solution before the uprising begins."

The diplomatic mission comes amid signs that those close to the O.T.C are becoming increasingly nervous about the long-term consequences of his defiance OF Castro men
When Dimitris Braham left the country there was initially speculation that he intended to follow the example of his former colleague Zin Zan, who defected to O.T.C last week.

But it now seems the acting foreign minister was carrying a message from Castro that he is willing to compromise.
One report suggested that the dictatorship of the O.T.C wanted to take over and turn the tour in to a non-alcoholic weekend of playing tiddle-winks.

Earlier, Foreign Secretary Dan C water boy defended the decision to allow Zin Zan into the O.T.C, despite anger from Castro and his men at the idea of granting him asylum.
Mr Charlton admitted there were "issues" over how to handle the defector, but stressed that his decision to abandon Castro had "weakened" the regime. He also signalled that the fun police would be allowed to interview Zin Zan about the mystery tour and other historic crimes he had committed in the last 10 years, saying: "We want more information about past events."

"I think that when someone like that says they want to get out it would be quite wrong to say no, you have got to stay in the revolution," he told the TAPS Si Elwell show.
"The Crown Office in Scotland wants to talk to him about what has happened in the past, such as Blackpool take 1 and 2. My officials are discussing with the Crown Office tomorrow how to go about that. That is not a bad thing either. We want more information about past events."

Watch out on future news events as the tour gets closer……………………

Is this history repeating itself, just like the famous bridge at Arnhem, is this a tour too far! In comparison - as the bridges fell, just like the touring venues, Blackpool, Hull, Nottingham, Liverpool, then at the final push, the resistance and in this case the revolution, was just too strong. The OTC stands quaking in it's boots, not knowing who to turn to. With rumours of defections & double agents, the rules of touring seems to have been thrown out of the window. No sectrets, no dress code, no meet time, no wonder in the corners of the club are sub plotters, dispots, harlequins & clowns looking for that weekness in the OTC, if they can be found. Propaganda & down right lies are a foot, a cowardly way to fight a war, the rebel way is always to SCORE (Seaton Carew Original Revelution Enclave) when away from home, bonding is strong, the clowns are smiling and the rebels are revolting.
VIVA LE TOUR... VIVA LE REVOLUTION

What's all this revolution rubbish, is it from people who aren't allowed out over night! Let's get down to business, let's get behind this bunch and sing your hearts out for the cause. I know Tank sometimes looks a bit gormless but I don't actually think that he is as stupid as he looks - as long as he doesn't bring his pigeon song with him. I hope the committee can string more than two words together and can lead the tour in song. Just a few tunes each would get this party started......

<i>A revolution (from the Latin revolutio, "a turn around") is a fundamental change in power or organizational structures that takes place in a relatively short period of time</i>

All of this talk of a revolution and no action only fuels the fact that this is, infact, not a revolution and simply a lot of hot air from a minority of elder statesmen who having nothing better to do between coffee breaks and giving people 2 options...

The O.T.C. remains united and the mystery tour remains a mystery. Time is ticking away and D-Day is fast approaching. Will Castro marshall his troups and create anything like the revolution he has gone on about for months and months.
Will the identity of the Whole Truth be uncovered? And more to the point, does anyone really care who he is anymore?
Will the virgins make it through the 'eye' of the storm and back home to the arms of their loving family members?

Only time will tell....

hmmm there is rumors flying around the place we are going is this true as micheal bubble has informed me somewhere close too Rotherham?

Everyone cares about the whole truth otherwise I wouldnt have so many mentions.

i have seen a heap of info on here regarding defecting, well I am certain that zin zan is a defect so this entirely possible. It is unfortunate that such a creature has to be removed from this island every few weeks to give the rest of us a break.

It is getting confusing now on the OTC which could stand for official tour committee or old tour committee or could it be out the castro/cambridge/clark/charlton etc!the possibilities are endless.

it seems that tour secrets must have got out if the new big v is trying to suggest a destination, so is it doncaster or sheffield, barnsley, pontefract or maybe back to a previous destination in wakefield or is it blackpool again!! It truly is a mystery and I cant wait to find out where the tour goes, assuming I am there.

The time is nearly upon us to see what the NTC (new tour committee or no to castro/cambridge etc) squad are cooking up, will it be chips or jacket spuds, youll just have to wait and see.

i expect there will be horsing around from jeff, manly wrestling from peter in nightclubs, plenty of food/drink for eddie, whistling while he works from Dan, discrimination from ginger Marco and inspiring team talks from Tank (cant wait).

The truth is out there, you dont know it but I have always known it and I will always speak it.

If only you could handle it! The whole truth

speaking of the truth, it all appears to have gone quiet from castro, i wonder if his men have been exiled just like the real cuba?

the official tour committee have also gone quiet, maybe they have got lost on their mystery tour!

its not long until another seaton tour, there are rules to be broken, beer to be drank, drunken arm wrestling in nightclubs to occur, perving from ken and tour apparel to be taken.

remember what goes on tour stays on tour, this could the truth, but wont be the whole truth!

and thats because you cant handle it!

A dark mysterious mist is comming on the "M" tour. Its been a long time, is it still good to grass? and do we still drink lots and enjoy ourselves?

Its Officail,

Tour meet time is 11:00 Friday morning, any lateness will not be tolerated unless a written note is received from parents or guardians!

Tour Officially starts at 12:30, after tour apparel has been given out. The bus will depart at 3:00pm. We will arrive back in Seaton on the Sunday at 7:30pm (Just a warning for the cricketers).

Not long to wait now for a great weekend..

Your Official TC....

Time is close my fellow revolutionists with only 1 week to go we shall have Victory over this dictatress regime & there crimes they have not yet committed against us the good tourist’s party.

We will fight fight fight for victory for we are noble and we are bold I can here us chant at the buzz-hem of all battles, the time is just about upon us to stop the mincing about with words and raise arms against the heinous crimes they have committed already and those yet to come.

Whispers through my Intelligence net work VLR of sneaks, chief sneaks and general chief sneaks tells me my fellow comrades are ready. Ready to let hell rain down on any body who dares to challenge the right for us to have fun, you only get one shot at this OTC and when its gone its gone for good so fail at your peril and face the consequences.

My Generals are ready, I’m ready, my army is ready, and the question is are you ready?

The time has come with one week to go tourists to declare which side of the fence you stand on, you can either be part of the revolution or be blown away by the revolution.

If you’re with the revolution show your name on this site before 8 o’clock on Thursday 28th of April and your name will be removed from the list.

VIVA – LA – REVOLUTION……………….

I have pretended to Castro for weeks as a red heron it case some one tried to assassinate our beloved leader.

I Purvey Ken declare allegiants to the revolution and all it stands for.

Down with the Committee viva la revolution.

i'm a virgin but it sounds to me as if the revolution has more power than the committee.

Don't think i should say this as a virgin but bring it on.


I JOSH declare allegiants to the revolution PLEASE LOOK AFTER ME.

if other virgins are the i do to

Viva la revolution