Looking to capitalise on the strong performance last time out versus Thomas Cook, the Baston XI travelled to the delightful market town of Boston. The rigorous schedule proved too much for one ‘old duffer’ and so the team sheet looked more youthful than ever, with only Hedley’s identical twin to hide in the field, a razor sharp performance looked in order.
Following a diligent look at what the Mayflower had to offer, Tim tossed with new best mate ‘Gazza’ and decided to have a bat, promptly setting his batsmen a target of 250 – obviously lacking confidence in his weakened bowling attack without the wily Grumps. Jon and Guy started brightly, picking off the bad balls with ease before Guy decided it was about time to give his wicket away, gifting Sam Gilding a solitary wicket in a poor bowling display (12-0-69-1). George joined Jon at the crease and after a steady debut the previous week, many of the supporters deserted the ground.
Baston's number 1 fan Nick Dyer came down to see us (pictured with Adam)
The run rate halted drastically with a lack of bleating from the new man and the pressure cranked up on run-machine Jono. He responded in timely fashion, gifting four chances to a variety of fielders, all of which did their utmost to keep him out in the middle. With George still struggling to hit the ball of the square, Jon raced to yet another 50 before a fielder took an unlikely catch at gully to finally remove him from the field for a match-high 66. V.S.M. came out to bat, and with one eye on the Boston 3rd XI, played all round a straight one to depart for 9. Hames swaggered out to the middle, in the hope that he might finally quash the ‘more birds than runs’ chants.
Guy making a massive balls-up in the scorebox
George soon departed after hitting one straight back at the bowler that was miraculously held by Major and hairy hero Scott joined Hames. Hames biffed Major towards cow for some much needed runs, and then chipped a snipper to Gazza only for the rotund captain to miss the chance. Gazza was furious, and with Hames slagging off his ‘shit scorebox’ it seemed he might be eaten alive. The threat was evidently enough, and having reached 18, Hames played a loose shot to give Shaun the Sheep his third wicket in a miserly spell of 12-2-33-3. Hames thought he had done enough to dispel the chants for one week, but it soon emerged that Rachel had in fact
Hames tries to put Rachel out of his mind in a fluent knock of 18
Back to the cricket, Lamin came in at 7 with his new Mars Bar, and biffed the bowling to all parts of the ground. Sporty continued to struggle, and was finally bowled by opener Charlie Ward. Midweek Captain Ben strode out, looking like anything but a cricketer and duly nudged an ugly 8 runs to help Lamin push Baston past the 200 mark. Lamin’s biffage certainly shocked all 3 travelling supporters and gave Guy an unnecessary challenge in keeping up with the scores. The final total of 201-6 gave Tim confidence his part time opening bowler Felix could do a job.
Excellent 45* from changed man John Lamin #roomwithadog
Following tea and a berating for all the players playing in ‘the worst league in the country’ from the ever supportive Tim, Adam and Felix looked to dismantle the top order. Adam started brightly but Frankenstein squeezed a few runs off his opening over to remove the gloss. Felix’s turn, and after an array of half volleys and long hops which saw his opening two overs go for 20, Hames was told to warm up. Adam provided the much needed breakthrough as Jon caught Frankenstein well standing up. An inspirational field change from Guy then confused the batsman and Felix removed the remaining opener after Ben decided to try and catch this one.
Leader of the attack Felix, showing Adam how to open the bowling, with a fine spell of 4-39
Felix continued to decimate the top order removing 4 out of the top 5, with figures from his last 10 overs being 10-2-19-4. Hames’ drop proved pivotal as he snatched a first Baston 5-fer from Felix’s grasp, but the swing king had well and truly put the Baston boys on top. The arrival of a wedding party soon distracted Hames and Jon, both ogling from the middle at the occasional piece of inbred talent. Lamin replaced Adam from his unfavoured end and a variety of summer tunes from surrounding houses greeted the change; Lamin was not so keen and changed ends. Young Holmes then proceeded to hit 4 shots to exactly the same space, prompting a field change. Just as planned, the next ball went to the same spot and Lamin had a wicket.
Big Six from Big Bri
Dyer saw this as an ideal opportunity to steal a few easy wickets and came on to bowl ‘more floaters than a sewage farm’. With V.S.M. still watching the other game and reacting excitedly to a dropped chance, it was surprising that he held onto a chance of his own to give Dyer his first wicket. Lamin looked to wrap it up but could only manage a spanking over his head for a huge six. That left the path open to Dyer, his flight and guile too much for the remaining batsmen, bowling one and getting another stumped to conclude the match.
Jim Clarke Junior
V.S.M. cornered Jim Clarke Junior to get the mugshot of all mugshots and the trip back to civilisation ensued. A convincing 79-run win pushed Baston above fierce rivals Friskney into the promotion places and the trip to their shithole now seems even more enticing.
Baston XI vs Boston 2nd XI #youth
Back row (from left): Nick Dyer, George Hartley, Scott Downie, Tom Hames, Ben Hudson, Felix Cunningham, Adam Hilless
Middle row (from left): Tim Dyer*, Guy Cunningham, John Lamin, Mark Richardson
Front row (from left): Jon Howard