Baston beat the northerners!

By Ben Hudson - June 20 2010
Baston beat the northerners!
Super Jono Howard Following last week's depressing defeat at Burgh-Le-Marsh, Baston looked to bounce back against Northern villagers Blankney. Read the report here...

Following a tough Wednesday grounds-keeping session, stressed skipper Dyer insisted on a good turnout for Friday’s wicket preparation with 6 people forced to cancel plans and help. Jon showed great proficiency with the roller but the party was soon spoiled as Ben snapped off the gearstick. While 5 players teamed up to paint the lines, Anthony decided to take the mower for a spin, cutting a perfect rectangle at the far end for his run-up.

On the morning of the game, some hung-over players went to nets for some much needed practice with Adam and Ben turning up at the agreed 9.30 meeting time. They ended up waiting around for an extra 20 minutes until learner driver Felix pulled up, only just mustering enough speed to get up the slight slope in the car park. Felix continued his good form being bowled 8 times in the nets, before crying.

Tim and the Behan

At the Shrine, Blankney had arrived for the early start with Tim winning his second toss on the bounce and sticking the northerners in. Popular youngster Callum Steele finished chatting with teammates and telling jokes to walk out to bat with keeper Foster. Clean-shaven Lamin took the first over, while Anthony marked out his run up on his prepared rectangle. Lamin got an instant reaction out of the surface with Steele popping up a couple of chances to the infield. However Anthony was struggling from his end, throwing down no balls and half trackers. Anthony blamed his erratic bowling on a slight hill at the crease despite no-one noticing any problems at wicket-prep with Jon taking a spirit level from his toolbox to check it was flat.

While the Baston bowlers struggled to get into a rhythm, and Lamin struggled to walk, Blankney exploded out of the blocks flying to 44 without loss. It took a bit of good fortune for Baston to take their first wicket as cheerful youngster Steele (27) was run-out by Paul Stewart despite being in his crease, with his popularity at his own club costing him his wicket. Baston felt some momentum but there were to be some expensive drops with debutant Sporty Scotty dropping Foster at mid-off, before Paul Stewart dropped the same player at square leg. Number 17 Behan was at the crease, with Dyer placing 7 fielders in his favoured gulley/point area, but Behan was able to pull a few boundaries away as Doug came around the wicket to the northern skipper. With run machine Behan looking set to go and get a big score, Doug produced the ball of the day as he bowled him with a fast yorker.

Anthony was bowling well from the other end and got a deserved wicket as he bowled number 4 Pearse. Ant bowled an unprecedented 11 over spell before joining Lamin in the seized up joint section of the field. With his pace bowlers unable to account for a small slope on the crease, Tim did the unthinkable and bowled from the ‘wrong’ end. He got a wicket early on as youngster Hall popped the ball to Adam at mid-on.

Tim was ripping through the Blankney middle order as countless batsman played around his dead straight deliveries, unable to hit the skipper off the square. Adam came on to bowl from the other end and was fairly tidy as he went at just 2 an over.

Northern keeper Foster was holding the innings together and reached his 50 with a sweep to the square leg boundary. Dyer had him out next ball with Jono taking a smart stumping.

Tim 7-17 with his eyes closed!

It was now down to experienced prima donna Woodcock to post a good score for Blankney, but he was bowled soon after, with the tail. Dyer took 7-17 from 10.3 overs, a spectacular contribution from the skipper, especially since he was bowling from his unfavoured end. Blankney’s last 7 wickets fell for just 35 runs, as they finished on 132.

With another function in the Barn, tea stalwart Tracey took the initiative to bring out a picnic for the two teams. All of the Baston boys were full of appreciation for the good work and creativity from Trace, but her teas were met with stinging criticism in Blankney’s website report. Not wanting to talk about their display, Blankney spent half of their report slagging off Tracey’s teas. Their report slated the lack of tripe sandwiches and a cup of tea and giving her a disrespectful 2/10. We hope they sleep with one eye open, because Tracey will soon find out where Blankney is.


Trace is always 10/10

Anthony and Lloyd got the run chase underway, but found little change out of opening sloweys; the accurate giant Holvey and grumpy cack hander Woodcock Snr. Lloyd was soon playing his usual array of drives while Anthony was happy to see off the good ball... and the bad ball, showing his full arsenal of defensive shots. Woodcock Snr was taken out of the attack, in favour of his son. This was not a good choice according to the older Wood Cock, who got in a right grump. Woodcock Junior picked up the wicket of Lloyd, who fell for 29.

Good banter on the boundary

Baston were going nicely at drinks but lost their second wicket in the 18th over with Anthony going the same way as Lloyd. Anthony faced 55 balls in a duck of epic proportions, including dotting out 8 maidens from man mountain Holvey, nearly breaking the Test Match record for longest ever duck. Baston were 39-2. Paul had a flying visit to the crease, hitting a trademark four before being cleaned up.

Lamin was playing a defensive innings, partly due to responsibility of one of the only remaining batsmen, and also because he was struggling to walk, not helped by Jono running him for a couple of doubles early in his knock. Lamin tried to get out as he passed the ball to mid-off Callum ‘Superstar’ Steele, but his drop was greeted by a sarcastic horn from Captain Dyer.

Tim with the horn

Every Baston boundary was being greeted with a chorus of horns and Doug’s native vuvuzela, impressing the cheerful northerners. Lamin finally fell with Baston on 79 as he gave irritated P. Woodcock a simple return catch. Jon and Doug got themselves in, while the boys on the boundary were enjoying themselves, sounding their horns and messing around with Felix’s ridiculous hat, using it as an ashtray and throwing it around.

We're lamin!

With Baston still needing over fifty to win, Jono stepped up and saw his side over the line, looking in fabulous touch and hitting expansive shots, smashing five 4s and five 6s in his 60*. Jon saw Baston past their target in the 37th over, emphatically smashing young Woodcock onto the nearby football field for another maximum. Jono was well supported by Doug (15) in their 58 run partnership

Doug and Jon - 58* run partnership

The dejected Blankney team got away quickly, while the boys headed back to the Spinner to celebrate. Sitting outside enjoying the sunshine, the usual banter was involved with people particularly harsh on Adam’s bowling. Adam found an unlikely ally in John Lamin who said “you bowled much better this week Adam...”, but before anyone could get a word in, he continued “cause you were f***ing s**t last week”. Lamin was in good form as he stuck up for his Postman Pat motor and also told everyone about his miserable missus. Talking of partners, Lloydie got an earful for sneaking off to the pub, and went home soon after with his tail between his legs.

Lamin = Postman Pat

The boys watched England’s painful 1-1 draw with the US, enjoying the burgers sold by the Spinner, but it was new boy Scottie who was the real winner as he bagged £12 in the sweepstake, treating some of his new teammates to a beer. There was bad news however as there is a new trench-foot problem in the gents.

The next day, Tim helped out best mate Mark “Smiler” Richardson as a few of the boys played for his eleven versus friendly jokers Moulton Seas End. Though playing at a great ground, the boys soon found themselves wanting to go home as Moulton’s Captain Prick treated everyone with a level of contempt not normally associated with friendly cricket. There was also no cup of tea, with only water being supplied in dirty old cups.

Moulton Seas End