By Andrew Townsin - May 15 2007
A Townsin 69 not out Baston’s prolific opening batsman Andrew Townsin describes two south lincs division 2 matches early in the 2006 season, firstly away at long-time rivals Cavaliers and secondly at home game against ‘High-flying’ Moulton.

Sometime in June……


Away v's Cavaliers

3rd game of the season for me on Saturday.

I am too old and fat to keep wicket on a hot humid June afternoon.

However, our captain (Uncle Tim) didn't agree or I had done something to

upset him...............45 overs, one bye (standing up to a medium pacer

who put his quick one a yard down leg - thanks Grumpster - well that is my

story and I am sticking to it.) A stumping, another that wasn't given (I am

convinced the umpire was texting on his mobile) and a catch standing up

that the umpire didn't give - you know it's out when the batsman is "not

sure" if he hit it. I hate cheats, at village level you should only be out

LBW if you are on the back foot and it would miss both leg and off stump

because it's hitting middle BUT you always walk when you hit it.

They got 157, a large proportion of them in wides courtesy of Ned Flanders

and Micky (now he's lived with a woman - you tart) Pearce - thanks mainly

to some tight bowling from Grumpster and a good effort (no honestly, I

find it hard to believe as well but it is true) from Darren.

We knocked them off for 2 wickets - I opened and stood at the other end

and watched as our best player Digby played an innings that took it away

from them. It took us 40 overs to get them, added to 45 overs of keeping I

was totally shattered and every part of my body hurt (and still does!) It

was 8.20pm when the game finished - that is one long but good day.



A few weeks later? ………


Played my 4th game of the Season on Saturday and it was a really strange

one. Baston are 2nd bottom of the league and play on the worst pitch in

Lincolnshire, our opposition are top of the league and home ground is a

chocolate box setting and a real belter. Unfortunately we played at home!

Their openers made light of a genuinely unsafe pitch making 94-0 from 21

overs. They were greatly aided by our rather wayward bowling - (typical

Baston we had our strongest attack for a couple of seasons yet managed to

bowl a record 28 wides in the game, I kid you not!) - Also their captain &

top batsman edged (well closer to middled) the ball to the keeper

(unfortunately me - I am too old & fat to do it anymore!) and didn't walk

and their umpire was obviously blind, deaf and had recently had his index

finger amputated - I HATE CHEATS.

It then stormed, we sat about for half-an-hour, we went to the pub for an

early tea, we sat about for another half-an-hour, I got showered and

changed only to be informed that Moulton Harrox wanted to give it another

half-an-hour before deciding to call it off. They were basically desperate

for easy points against us.

It stopped raining, they insisted on playing on - the league results state

that once a game has started you cannot reduce the overs (a total of 90

with first innings a max of 45), so they proposed to declare on 200 or

after 35 overs which ever came first.

They then went on a whack-a-day fest which resulted in our canny spinner

Tim Dyer (canny is a word used in village cricket to describe an old slow

bowler who never turns it off the straight) picking up 7 wkts for very few

- 2 nice stumping to O&F, thank you very much - they declared on 169 - 9

after 30 overs - figuring that they had more than enough runs to beat us

bunch of clowns on a dodgy pitch livened up by a storm.

I opened, in the third over I responded to my partners call for a

(relatively) quick single only to get two thirds of the way down and see

him turn round and retreat into his own crease - oh joy we are now both

standing at the same end - exit O&F stage left. Moulton, however, remember

my partner scoring a few against them on their home pitch last year and

think it would be beneficial for him to go and keep the old & fat bloke in

- so they claim as he left the crease it should be him who is out and call

me back, we are not really a 100% sure about the rules but my partner does

the honorable thing and walks off (it was all his fault anyway) - Moulton

are counting the points.

At 9.15 pm 38 overs later it's 170-5 with me 69* their mood has altered a


The jugs flowed!