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November 18th
Ian Mullaney on the way back from Blackheath; “Why are we following the river, there is no river near Richmond?”.
That is Richmond-upon-Thames Ian!!!
October 28th
Candidates were a bit thin on the ground this week: the unchallenged winner and Fanny of the week is therefore PC Eryka Wessell.
The citation: The 3s were storming to victory against Footscray in what would be Terri Siwek, Duchess of Bookham's 2356th and last game for Richmond. The game was almost over and the crowd were roaring for a try from the Duchess to seal her magnificient career. Meston takes a tap penalty in their 22 and pops it to Tezza, who runs gamely forward with 4 or 5 defenders hanging off her but slows 2 yards short of the line. The crowd roars for all 14 of Tezza's teamates to shove her over for the try, but Eryka calls for the pop...and promptly runs into a brick wall and is going nowhere. Next thing she knows, the Duchess arrives and, like a great white emerging from the depths, torpedos Eryka (who had both feet in the air) over for the try. Eryka, you might have scored a try but YOU'RE A FANNY!
October 14th
Candidate #1 For the second week running, Fi Pocock, this time for repeatedly getting lost and turning up at Wasps half way through the Second half. Why she didn't follow her Mum and Dad who left from the same place and turned up in time for the warm up we will never know. Fi, YOU'RE A FANNY!
Candidate #2 Our illustrious chairwoman, The Queen , TJ Sutton.
Picture the scene: an intrepid Waspie attempts to carry the ball up the short side. Despite the forlorn attempts of 2 of her team mates to rip the ball, she is bundled into touch by about 5 Richmond players. All eight players then collapse in a heap on the ground just over the touchline. TJ, for leaving your Prada handbag on the sideline, and for the look on your face when you realised it was burried at the bottom of that heap, YOU ARE A FANNY! We have received a message from Sara Anastasi that says it all: "I seem to have the faint imprint of an expensive handbag buckle in a fleshy part of my anatomy!" Sara
And from the 2s at last:::
Candidate #3 The 2s coach driver - for honking his horn in support from behind the stand just at the exact moment that Vickie started her run up to kick the penalty to win the game!
Candidate #4 Pickle (another one for the 2nd week running) for taking a quick tap in front of the posts when 3 points would win the game given that Vickie (aka Chris Patterson) hadn't missed all day, forcing Keefers to sweet talk the referee into stopping the quick kick and allowing the attempt at goal - much to the disgust of the opposition coach who unfortunately for him wasn't as close to the action as the Richmond coach!
Candidate #5 Maz - she knows why!!!! Yes Keefers but the rest of us don't - anyone care to spill?
7th October
Once again, a big bunch of fannies this week, in particular some early entries for the prestigious Karen's Kickers award this week. e-mail Shaz if you'd like to make a further nomination:
Candidate #1 The one and only Emma 'Fish' Layland who was so knackered that she tried to kick the ball off the pitch with 80 mins up to end the game. Only to end up having to sprint after it as it danced just inside the touchline for 80 metres up field. She finally caught up with it, only to be tackled and end up having to give a try scoring pass to someone else - not Fish 'hattrick' Layland's style at all!
Candidate #2 (Nomintaed by Rachel Samuels)
Let me paint you a picture. Richmond IIs were living the dream and playing some fantastic, committed, inspirational rugby. The pressure was on the opposition scrum. Richmond IIs won the ball and it fell to that reliable Number 9 Ms Pickle. She bent down, gathered the ball up in her little hands and had a moment of clarity and some would say unparralled vision. She went to box kick the ball over the scrum…the ball sailed 20 metres through the air...not horizontally but vertically. The ball sliced off the boot, went straight up and straight back down. Ms Pickle promptly (without moving her feet) caught said ball and was shoved into touch. A proper fanny was born.
Candidate #3 2nd XV Head Coach Lisa 'Keefers' O'Keefe who, count 1, swore she wasn't going onto the pitch (especially not against Vicki) and had 4 contingency plans (mostly involving putting backs into the front row) to avoid this looming disaster, in the end, she made Joey Morgan fein injury and even Ian's attempt to tie her shoe laces together couldn't stop her going on! Count 2, once on the pitch she sees Pickle put in the aforementioned box kick and goes charging up the pitch like a Scottish Lewis Moody but with more scars intent on splattering the catcher (even if it were Vicki), 30 seconds later she's still running forwards and thinking where is it, by God she's got some height on that, it'll have snow on it, where are my mittens.....
Candidate #4 A late entry from The Sun where Fi Pocock admitted that despite joining the club some time ago, she had not noticed that Posh and Becs are an item. Not even the recent purchase of the new Beckingham Palace gave the game away. BTW if you're any good at stripping wallpaper, see Posh - Tom and Katie's efforts with the scrappers have so far proved a bit pathetic!
Candidate #5 Valgard Trygstad Fleury for asking if she could put her make up in the valuables bag.
And Candidate #6 (again from Rach Samuels): This was Chonny at 8.04pm on 6th October 2007. There is no need for further words.
30th September
Candidate #1 Dr Karen Jones, for forgetting she'd changed clubs and yelling "Common Henley" in the middle of Sunday's match. A henious crime if ever there was one!
Candidate #2 Amy Turner for crashing the ball up in the centres and ending up lying on the groud with her shorts and pants round her knees!
Candidate #3 Terri Siwek for appointing herself 2s captain when Hannah went off and overruling the real captain's decision to kick a penalty for goal - Tezza wanted a scrum and who was going to argue with her???
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