Official West Hartlepool RFC

It has been reported that street parties are underway today over on the dark side celebrating the governments u turn on Pastie tax!! haha

Riots galore at Greggs in Powlett Road this morning. What made it worse was that a young chav had to re-tuck his socks back into his tracky bottoms because his leg was rammed by a buggy being pushed by a 30 year old granny who was looking after her 14 year old daughters twins whilst she attended St Hilds school.

Just hear Riot Police are being drafted into West View/ Central area as all the shops have ran out of Pink Lambrini due to the partying going on....more to follow

The celebrations have now resumed due to a lorry load of White Lightening being twocked and freely distibuted around the area

We have had a superb couple of weeks over here on the 'dark side'and we thought things couldn't have gone any better but then the great news of the 'pastie tax' being abolished came through and well.....it's just been amazing.

However on a worrying note we have heard that the government is to bring in 2 new taxes and i must admit that I have for the last few nights been kept up worrying that they don't have too much of a devastating effect on our neighbours from the plush house on the hill that is the Catcote Road School Playing Fields:-

1. The building brick tax, now unfortunately this will hit us over here are Rovers quite badly as we have the clubhouse and the sunroofed Oakes stand, but luckily for you you had the foresight to plan for this buy getting rid of your home on Brierton Lane and investing in buildings made from wood and mdf. Surely this will save you fortunes in taxes plus you may be able to get some kind of incentive from the local council and government for your new green status.

2. The dog turd and mole hill tax, now unfortunately this will hit you quite hard what with your playing surface being on a school playing field on which people regularly walk their pets. Once again I must say well done on getting rid of Brierton Lane and those pesky gates and walls and going for the open-plan IKEA multi-pack,self-assembly type of ground. We have had a meeting around the back of the Brus and one suggestion from the dark side would be to put down all the wax-jackets and big hats on the pitch to provide some sort of pitch cover.

I can only hope you can work your way through theses up and coming issues and once again keep reminding us what it is like to be members of the landed gentry and allow us from the dark side some crumbs from the top table.

Regards
Finbar



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 29/05/2012 18:24 by Kingies-fishcakes.

Glad you have had a great few weeks and hope it continues until pre season training at least which should be about...end of August?
We are having a crisis meeting about the brick tax and were hoping to do a bag pack at Harrods or Fortnum and Masons.
We do have a small granstand which looks far safer than yours by the way but we are happy to keep the brollies and wax jackets for now if needed.
All the best :)

the celebrations are actually for the appointment of boys brigade new coach gareth forman

Not forgeting his new forwards and backs coaches.

Looks like its going to be a good season a brigde.

Early front runners for the D&N 3 title

Is this true about Gareth leaving? If so then it has been kept quiet? Any reason for this? I wish him well if he has and thank him for the couple of seasons with west but I must admit im in shock

Good luck to Brigade & it will be nice to finally have two decent team in the town which has been sadly lacking for years.

Breaking news

During the celebrations on the headland there was a tragic accident.
A bike had a head on collision with a pram it took the fire brigade two hours to clean up all the sea coal.

Hi. On behalf of Greggs we would like to appologise for the national shortage of Steak Bake during the Jubilee weekend. There was an unprecidented surge of steak bakes sold from our Powlett Road outlet during our buy one get two free jubilee promotional period.

We appreciate steak bakes are normally a Christmas delicacy on the West View and Headland estates but we did not anticipate the sudden uptake in our offer. Sorry for the inconvenience to those non Chav people of the North East.

as a member of the local paparazzi can you confirm the leaving of gareth foreman or are yous in denial